Monday 29 June 2015

Ask the expert | Baby-led potty training (BLPT)

Following our recent guest post by Amber Hatch, author of Nappy Free Baby: a practical guide to baby-led potty training from birth, we have asked Amber Hatch to run a live Q&A session.

Amber will be answering your questions on Monday 13 July from 8.30pm until 10pm ...so get asking! Please start leaving your questions here now! 

21 comments:

  1. Do you have lots of potties just dotted over the house? Is there a particular brand of potty that is suitably small for a young baby?

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    1. Hi Kayleigh,
      Thanks for the question. I think this is just down to personal choice. Some people like to keep them just in the bathroom - I liked to have one within easy reach. Especially when they were tiny.
      A lot of people like to use the Baby Bjorn little potty, or smart potty, but I think that most potties are suitable, actually - just bear in mind you'll have to hold them over it or support them on it for a while. The boots one is OK. For a little baby - under 3 months, I think an icecream tub or pudding bowl is often better. Something you can hold securely between your legs. I've had good use out of a children's beach buck. Far and away my favourite is the classic Victorian child's chamber pot. Love it.

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  2. My son is 13months old now and has been using a potty since 6months old. we have had a lot of success with poos but wees not so much. however he is now at the childminder and things have switched and we are having more success with wees over poos. Have you got any advice?

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    1. That's interesting. It may be that the switch to the childminders has been so exciting and interesting for him, that he has confused his associations. Babies/toddlers are so quick to form new association, both towards and away from the potty. So a run of misses could easily mean that he starts using the nappy for poos as a default mode. But not to worry, because a little bit of high input time from you - perhaps some naked time and reminding him where poo goes may just do the job.
      This period (13m) is a big transitional period anyway, and new found mobility often has toddlers pooing in funny places, so it also could be just a phase that will pass.
      Great to hear that you are having more success with wees! long may that last!

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  3. My daughter is 4 months old and I'm not quite ready to start full potty training but would like to start offering the potty occasionally (eg in the morning and after feeding) as well as using cloth nappies in the meantime. Is there any benefit to starting with the potty like this and do you have any tips? Thanks, Sarah

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    1. Hi sarah,
      Absolutely! I would always recommend that people start small, and just see how it's working out for you. You may find that you have to put in a little bit more effort over the first few days, but once you and baby have the hang of it, then you don't need to be so consistent when you offer. The important thing is for LO to start to build up that association with the potty and passing waste. Once she's got that (it won't take long - just a bit of luck and a few catches) she'll probably give it a try every time you put her on the potty.
      So then you could just give her the opportunity to go every time you change her nappy, for instance. As you say after feeds and naps are also great times, as she is likely to do something then.
      Plenty of benefits - very catch you get keeps her nappy cleaner and dryer for longer - but give it a try and find out for yourself! (It would be lovely if you could post back here with a report on how you got on!)

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  4. Hi! My daughter is coming up to 9 months old and for the last few weeks I have been putting her on the potty when she makes her "I'm about to do a poo" squeak. I talk to her while she's on there, telling her that she is on the potty and that she is doing a poo, hoping that she will start to build an association.
    Is there any point to doing this? I have read elsewhere that I should be putting her on the potty at certain times of day but this seems so pointless and time-consuming that I can't bring myself to do it.

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    1. Hiya,

      Is there any point? Well it sounds like you are saving yourself a ton of dirty nappies! So, I would have thought that was worth it in itself...

      But perhaps you mean is there any long term value - yes I think so. If you've been successfully doing this for weeks, then I would almost guarantee that she has already built up that association. It sounds like you aren't sure because you are catching it when she's already in the act of going, so to speak. That's fair game and it works that way for many babies.
      If you carry on doing this, then she will find potty training very easy (especially for poos) as she will be very used to using the pot. Lots of toddlers find the transition from pooing in their nappy to pooing in the potty quite hard, so helping her do that from a young age is doing her a big favour.

      Is it worth putting her on at other times? That's completely up to you. If you are worried about it being time consuming, but you are interested in giving it a try, you could put her on at convenient times like bath time and change times.

      Does she sometimes wee in the potty too, when you put her on for a poo? if so that would suggest you were off to a good start, and you may find it quite worthwhile to try her at other times of the day too. Actually, once you've got the hang of it it's not that time consuming, as babies often tell you within a few seconds whether or not they want to go.

      But if you are happy with what you are doing at the moment - there's no need to do any more!

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  5. Hi Amber, first of all - thank you so much for writing this great book! Your writing style is great and makes the whole thing sounds so easy :-) I was just wondering if you had any ideas regarding my 14 month old son. I've been catching 90% of his poos since he was two weeks old, but since he's started walking at 10 months he hides to do his poos. I've had him in nappies most of the time but with plenty of nappy free or training pants around the house. Unfortunately I was never able to detect any signals, even when he was very young and always used timing and intuition for both poos and wees. We're not catching ANYTHING at the moment, even though he seems to be pretty aware of where poos and wees should go. I know that this is typical for this age, but it just seems to last for a long time...

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    1. Hi Annina,
      Thanks for the lovely feedback on my book – glad you enjoyed it!
      It's great to hear that you've had so much success from a young age - it can be quite difficult to adjust if the catch rate drops!

      This is classic behaviour of a child who is learning to be independent in his toileting - he's just getting the hang of controlling his own functions (though will still make mistakes sometimes) and he probably doesn't want you to interfere. By this age conditioning is less important, though still plays a part.

      If he's hiding for his poos, that is potentially a good sign, as he obviously has a high degree of awareness. Sounds like he wants some privacy. I have heard of this problem being solved with some really creative thinking. For example setting up a secret "poo den" where he can do his business in private, perhaps in a play tent or similar. Make it really fun. DO you use the great outdoors? That's often a winner too. Finally, I would suggest enlisting the help of a slightly older child, because seeing a peer use the potty is incredibly influential for this age group.

      The fact that you have mostly used timing and intuition can be problematic at his age, so it may be worth really trying to watch him during some dedicated time to try to build up the wee/poo/potty association i.e. whisk him to the potty when he is urinating/pooing. Then you may find he starts to hold on a bit - and that's when you start seeing signals. (Though by the sounds of it the hiding behind the sofa is a pretty strong signal!)

      But most important thing is to keep it fun and don't get frustrated, as you can always try again in a month or two, if he needs a bit of space.

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    2. Ha! I think it's time to get his older sister's poo den out again. Now you mentioned it, I remembered that this has actually worked before. Thank you so much for your ideas.

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  6. Hi Amber
    Our boy is 21months and he's becoming increasingly reliable using the potty. He's either asking or we're catching most wees.
    He knows when he needs to poo and will walk around saying 'weewee poo'. He'll go back and forward to the potty but get increasingly upset. He doesn't really want to sit on the potty so we've managed to get him to hover over it. We normally manage to keep everything contained! It seems to be the act of pooing that he gets upset about. Once he's done he's happy to take a look and help take it to the toilet. He normally goes every day or every other day.
    Not really sure how to get him to relax. I tell him what's happening and that's it's ok to poo on the potty.
    Thanks!

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    1. Hi Sarah,

      That sounds great with the wees!

      It would be helpful to know if this possible pooing fear is a new development, or something he's been doing previously...?

      But it sounds like you are doing a great job. It will probably be a case on continuing until he gets through this phase... As long as his poos themselvess are normal (i.e. not constipated) then I don't think you particularly need to worry. That would be the problem, if he starts holding it. Have you checked them against the Bristol stool chart? http://www.continence.org.au/pages/bristol-stool-chart.html
      If that doesn't ring alarm bells, I'd say continue as you are, perhaps also trying to help him sit on the potty with a story or special toy.

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    2. Thanks Amber. Up until recently if he was nappy free and needed a poo we'd put a nappy on as he'd get so upset I didn't want him to start holding it in. He'd then poo perfectly fine. When he was younger we didn't really have a problem with poos on the potty - we didn't catch them often but he was happy to sit! I have a feeling it's just at home he has a problem. My mum said he's fine when she's with him!

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    3. Hi Sarah, thats' very interesting, so for some reason he has an anxiety, and presumably a preference for the nappy - I'd just keep doing as you are, because if he's sensitive about this, it will only get worse if he gets even more used to pooing in his nappy.
      Interesting that you think he's worse at home - perhaps he senses some kind of special interest coming from you? who knows... I would try to be very low key and low pressure about using the potty, but totally try to keep him going outside his nappy.

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  7. My little boy is 19months and not keen on sitting on his potty either and we've been pottying since 6 months - either holding him over a plastic basin or the loo with mostly success and the occasional off week/month. Am so interested to see the reply to this. I do find giving him something to hold (bath toys, empty plastic bottles etc) makes him relax if I definitely know he needs to go but find he's resisting.

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    1. Hmm interesting... they can get very assertive around this age. I'd try to be as creative as possible, and also make it really easy for him to do it by himself, for example a step up to the loo, so he can safely get there by himself. Also, see if you can get some older children to model using the potty.
      Try outside too - most love weeing on the leaves etc.

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  8. Thank you Amber! And thanks to everyone who's joined the conversation tonight.

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  9. Thanks so much for all the questions - it's been fun! Don't forget if you need more information, you can check out my website www.nappyfreebaby.co.uk or you can buy my book Nappy Free Baby: a practical guide to baby-led potty training from birth.

    http://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/0091955335/ref=as_li_tl?ie=UTF8&camp=1634&creative=6738&creativeASIN=0091955335&linkCode=as2&tag=napfrebab05-21&linkId=UG5Y62JZUG5DTC53

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  10. Just to let you know that Amber Hatch is doing another live Q&A on Facebook's Nappy Science Gang page on 22 September at 9pm
    https://www.facebook.com/groups/257856407757848/?fref=ts

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